There is something to be said for growing older and wiser. Yesterday was my birthday; yet another has come and gone. I suppose the adage is true, that getting older is a privilege denied to many and one to be embraced.
I remember my mom and older cousins or relatives always saying life began at 40. It seemed so awfully far away. FOURTY. Gawd! But seeing as we’re in a whole new era now, and time is speeding up (it is, right?) I think for us Generation Y’ers that our 30’s are their 40’s. It goes like this:
We’re spending far less time concerned about what other people think.
And if you’re not, then try harder. One of my favourite quotes, and one I try and remind teenage Tyra of as often as I can, goes like this: “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others thought of you if you realised how seldom they do.” Life truly is a unique experience for each and every one of us. Worrying about what others think of you is draining and a waste of your time and energy. Truly.
We don’t have our shit figured out, but we’re ok with that.
There are no grown-ups. Well, in essence, we ARE them. But we have no idea what that means. We all have issues, so many issues. We’re overworked, we can’t find work, babies and kids are little demons, finances are a nightmare, we have things to do and be, we’re multi-tasking something chronic and we’re forgetting important things. We pick up the pieces and keep on going. We have to. We’re ok with it. Well, we’re trying to be ok with it.
We’re allowed to love sleep.
We don’t pretend we’re party animals any longer. We might well still like a good night out dancing (oh god, not me!) or a good razzle, but we’re also ok with saying Nope. Need sleep. It’s become socially acceptable. Our friends understand. Mostly because we’re all stressed, the babies are insomniacs, we’re insomniacs, we’re over-thinkers and we Just. Don’t. Sleep. Well. Now the 30’s have hit we know the power, the thrill, the seductive calling of a good 8 hours.
Some friendships don’t stand the test of time.
We’re learning to be ok with a changing landscape of who and what is important to us. I feel a deep loss when it becomes clear that a friendship is ending, or has ended. I feel this even more profoundly when it’s a friendship that has come some way, perhaps a school or varsity friend. While longer friendships are by no means more important, there is a sadness when a friendship runs it’s course. And this will happen. Life unwinds and we find we’re not compatible, we develop and change and grow apart. In essence it means we’re standing up for what we believe in, not putting up with something that doesn’t work for us. We’re still growing and opening ourselves up to new experiences, new adventures, new conversations. And there are those friends who are still around, new and old friends, and those conversations and connections are gold.
Maybe I’ll remember more about what I’ve learned. For another time.